My Most Famous Tweets

To commemorate and commiserate the newly launched updates section of my website, I'd like to review my most famous tweets of all time.

This is a screenshot from a message I sent to my mom. It tells a story old as time, one of perseverance, for despite failing to invent a new diet pizza, I persisted and managed to invent a thrilling new pizza meta-topping.

Likewise, in this exchange, despite my mother’s failure, I maintained my poise and had the wisdom to screenshot her lack of urgency during this historic moment, for posterity, and gained one organic like in the process.